Testing My Patience

Well, I have no substantial update following my last post. Mr Grey and I have spoken briefly – and I mean briefly – but not about his tattoo. We were supposed to meet on Sunday and then I gave him the option to rearrange. Why? Because if he’s that tetchy and stressed then I need to time my interrogation well. Which means I’ve gone a whole week without questioning him.

I know to some this isn’t a long time, but for me, it’s major. Everything about me is immediate. I hate waiting. I also hate not being in control of my emotions. I am a massive control freak and going from ‘I’m going to dump him’ to ‘I’m going to slap him’ to ‘I need to talk to him now’ to ‘I’ll give him his space til he’s calmed the fuck down’ has been trying to say the least. That said, I feel immensely proud of myself for not contacting him over the weekend until he contacted me.

I’m being far too considerate of his feelings. He doesn’t know I’ve been in this turmoil for the past week but you can bet your bottom dollar when I do actually speak to him, he bloody will do. I’ve cancelled our maybe date later this week too because I just can’t handle meeting up with him when I’m feeling like this if his mind won’t be there.

And so I have one last test of my patience. Wait until next week when I promise myself that come what may, I’ll be meeting and questioning the daylights out of him. The fact I’m willing to do this speaks volumes to anyone who knows me about how I feel, because this is definitely not normal Freechick behaviour.

If he knows what’s good for him, he’ll recognise this.

Advertisements