How NOT to get laid

So, Mr Soldier is still on my case. He texted this morning, asking if we could go out. I said no and that I was saving my money for my trip to France next week. He then texted again at lunchtime, asking if I had any ‘sexy single friends’ I could hook him up with. Of course I do, but I wouldn’t let them touch him with a bargepole – he’s a player. That and girls don’t generally like to be set up with their friend’s sloppy seconds. So imagine my surprise when my phone just bleeped with this:

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You’re joking, right?

I’d like to say that this is the first time he’s done this, but it isn’t. He’s told me apparently fancies me, as in, wants to date but all I’m getting is ‘I’m horny’. And on what planet does he think that this approach is going to get him anywhere, given how he frequently asks about my ‘sexy single friends’ and goes so far as to like my Facebook photos of them? Of course, I said no. I’ve already had a bite of that cherry and I don’t want another one, thanks very much.

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4 thoughts on “How NOT to get laid

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