Testing My Patience

Well, I have no substantial update following my last post. Mr Grey and I have spoken briefly – and I mean briefly – but not about his tattoo. We were supposed to meet on Sunday and then I gave him the option to rearrange. Why? Because if he’s that tetchy and stressed then I need to time my interrogation well. Which means I’ve gone a whole week without questioning him.

I know to some this isn’t a long time, but for me, it’s major. Everything about me is immediate. I hate waiting. I also hate not being in control of my emotions. I am a massive control freak and going from ‘I’m going to dump him’ to ‘I’m going to slap him’ to ‘I need to talk to him now’ to ‘I’ll give him his space til he’s calmed the fuck down’ has been trying to say the least. That said, I feel immensely proud of myself for not contacting him over the weekend until he contacted me.

I’m being far too considerate of his feelings. He doesn’t know I’ve been in this turmoil for the past week but you can bet your bottom dollar when I do actually speak to him, he bloody will do. I’ve cancelled our maybe date later this week too because I just can’t handle meeting up with him when I’m feeling like this if his mind won’t be there.

And so I have one last test of my patience. Wait until next week when I promise myself that come what may, I’ll be meeting and questioning the daylights out of him. The fact I’m willing to do this speaks volumes to anyone who knows me about how I feel, because this is definitely not normal Freechick behaviour.

If he knows what’s good for him, he’ll recognise this.

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39 thoughts on “Testing My Patience

    • Basically, when I see him I will ask about the tattoo. From what I’ve gathered about him, doing this beforehand when he’s all stressed out may not be the right time. Reason why I’m waiting til next week is that this week is his busiest of the year. Kind of like the end of financial year busy.

      • So you WERE shaking your head! The cancellation was an impulsive action, I can’t help it! Ugh. And no, usually it’s the men that cancel. But I am now thinking its weird I’ve heard nothing at all since sending that text last night. All this confusion is going to make my hair go grey!!

      • Lol wow!! This is newsflash to me. I don’t just think and know that you’re wrong. I know that your 100% wrong. So more guys have canceled on you in your lifetime than you’d canceled on?
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

      • Hell yes! I don’t cancel dates unless something urgent comes up. Lost count of the number of times I or my friends have been cancelled on. It can’t be THAT different in the states, surely??

      • You don’t cancel dates!!? I think you should congratulate yourself on being the only chic on the glob who doesn’t or never canceled a date. This’ cause for celebration. I’m not tryna be a dick,but this’ just unheard of to me. I’ve had a chic cancel on my 4 nights in a row(Friday night until Monday night). This isn’t rare. It’s the norm with any girl to stand guys up or cancel
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

      • Wow that’s insane! Nope – never cancelled unless it was like a family emergency. Only because I hate it when people do it to me. Told you I was considerate – treat others how you wish to be treated isn’t just a saying in my world. Frankly I’d have stopped trying after she cancelled twice. And yes. I have just realised what I’ve said lol

      • Yea,women hate it when men cancel on them,yet it doesn’t stop them(women)from canceling on men. Everything you’re saying, every other girl says the same thing and have the same moral standings; yet they still cancel on dates for flimsy reasons. But it’s all part of dating. I have a rule that I teach in pickup which is to expect a girl to cancel between 2-3 times before she actually commits to meeting. It’s a lack of comfort issue plus anxiety why women always cancel on me, so I don’t even blame women for it
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

      • Women don’t just stand guys up/flake and cancel because they want to be cold bitches. They cancel mainly because of a lack of comfort with the guy. Meaning,they don’t feel comfortable with the idea of meeting him (although they committed to the date). She isn’t sure who the guy is, he could be a serial killer,rapist,murderer,etc. Perhaps he has a GF who might spot them out,etc. All those are lack of comfort and legitimate reasons why women cancel on dates. As long as the guy can make her comfortable; she has a better chance of committing and showing up.
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

      • But that’s my point – everything up to now was high value. It was easy. It has just gone flip mode :-/ I am going to call him tonight if I’ve heard nothing by the evening as its just bordering on rude

  1. Props on patience.

    One thing makes me wondering that he probably noticed and has a feeling that something coming up. Think about it, you come from vacation, you don’t call him until he calls and than you cancel 2 last meetups, he surely knows something about to come. I would call you out on this behavior and talk about what happening, you just cannot run when there is sense of problems, it is bad communication on his part.

    • I’m not sure, he’s been so up his own arse with work he might not have noticed. Plus, the no contact thing is only since Friday, and I told him that’s cos I knew he was busy. That said, I’d tried to ask about the tattoo while I was on holiday so he may have an inkling.

      Will just have to wait and see. I have said that if I don’t hear from him by Thursday I will call him – I cancelled our date last night and have heard nothing so far today.

    • I see. I still do not buy it that he has been so busy that he had no time to sit and think about it a bit, it is kind of expected that you will want to see him and not cancel 2 last dates and he will not want them canceled either.

      But of course you know situation better than anyone else, so i can only assume lol

      • I would have hoped so, but at the moment all I’m getting is silence punctuated by the odd text. I’m trying my best not to be needy or text him. He’s said if he wanted to stop seeing me he’d have told me, so we’ll see. What’s sad is that when he did text, I was stupidly happy. Body temperature rose and everything :-/

      • I can kind of seeing him doing this silence thing actually, because despite all his red flags you are still with him and excited to hear from him. You teach him that it is ok, and put yourself in position where you are follower (nothing wrong with it as long as you trust his leadership, which might be not good idea currently).

      • I think you are the one who teaching him how he can treat you. Either way you look on it, it seems like the amount of red flags get more and more.

        I know you have feelings for him, but you really have to sit down and make list of what good and what wrong and go with the logic on this one, you feelings will only grow and you will be much more hurt is you walk away in 3 years than now, because you will be much more attached.

        There just way too many red flags.

      • The list would have been 80% good, with the only issues being the amount his ex contacts him as I’ve blogged about, and the vasectomy. Now it’s all gone in the other direction. But yes, I hear you

      • That and him not being in any rush to move on with his life and get the actual divorce from ex. The tattoo kind of proof of it.

        Coming up not being able ever have kids with him or any kind of family. Both are very big things.

      • Yes they are – and the kids thing I’ve only just really found out about. The divorce thing never really bothered me when he told me since we’d only been seeing each other for like a week lol

      • Just give him call and talk to him or even better do it face to face. Otherwise we can talk here in blog until end of times and never really know what going on lol

      • Heck no! You’ve provided some food for thought – really value your advice! 🙂 didn’t think about the fact I might be sending dodgy signals myself by not calling and cancelling dates!

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