In A Serious State Of Confusion!

OK, I need some advice. I know I have a penchant to always assume the worst, but even the ever optimisitic Miss Sunshine has been stumped by this one.

So, as you know, I’ve been sunning it up (and I use that term loosely) in Ibiza with Miss Yoyo and Miss Sunshine over the last week. It was a nice holiday, but it’s been somewhat overshadowed by a text I got from Mr Grey. He had his second sitting for his half sleeve tattoo, and he sent me a picture of it. It wasn’t until I got back to the hotel that night that I looked at it properly, and noticed some roman numerals. When I looked at the date, I realised its significance. It’s the date he got married.

Now, he separated from his wife two years ago in bad circumstances. So I can’t understand why he’d want to have the date of his wedding etched forever more onto his skin. Add to that the fact that when I asked what it was, I got swatted away like a fly and I am thoroughly confused. Since then, I’ve barely eaten – all I feel is sick. Am I being used as a distraction for him? Is he still pining for her? Is the fact they’re only separated and not divorced really because of money, or is it something else? They have a LOT of contact and while I know they have to because they have kids, I’m now wondering if having kids might be an excuse for him to have contact. Is it just a map of significant things that have happened in his life? And if so, how am I meant to feel about that? It doesn’t help that he almost rammed the fact that his vasectomy was 100% final down my throat either.

Should I be worried?

I plan to ask these things when I see him, which isn’t for another 4 days. For someone as impatient as me, this is absolute torture and I can’t promise that I’ll hold out until then. I’m not an unreasonable person, but this has thrown me into a state of confusion over where I stand. It’s making me initiate a conversation I didn’t think we needed to have yet. The ‘what is this relationship about’ conversation. I was happy to just go with the flow before, we were getting on well enough and he was the one leading on everything, but now I’m not sure whether I’m coming or going. I don’t think I’ve ever been so confused about anything before. Ever.

I can’t even think about my holiday – this has just overshadowed it for me, and that is not a good thing. Though I did have fun.

I don’t know what to do.



20 thoughts on “In A Serious State Of Confusion!

    • I will, I’m just trying to wait until I see him. We’re not meeting today now as I decided it might not be the best idea to talk about it after this week! But I will ask him when I see him next, or possibly on the phone. It depends how much my nerves hold out

      • Sure – I would be happy to expand. I’m frequently extremely sarcastic, saying the exact opposite of what I mean for comedic purposes, while implying my true position on the matter.

        My position in this case, straight up, is run, do not walk, from this dude, because I’m absolutely positive you can find another guy out there with roughly similar characteristics aside from being totally hung up on his ex and thinking about her when he’s with you. But hey, that’s just me on the outside looking in! What do I know?

  1. We have a saying in Russian that basically says “there is no smoke without fire”. When too many things look like coincidence it is not coincidence any more, nothing happens for no reason.

    The question why you put yourself in situation to be with guy who separated and seems like not going to divorce any time soon, add to it him not being able to have any more kids. So you cannot have family with him or kids.

    Also they are leaving separately now, and I cannot see how their expenses going to change if they actually sign divorce.

    You know situation better than any of your readers, just be honest with yourself.

    • Yep, I hear you. I do know the situation better than my readers, but I wonder if into trusting. I don’t want to become cynical. Thing is, he’s the one who’s led on this from the start – I was quite happy just going along and doing my own thing. Always the way! They are living separately and have been since they separated. Ugh, I don’t know. I have to speak to him to find out I guess. But I have been listening to you guys, which is why I wanted advice because you have pointed out how I always assume the worst lol

      • On a side note stop sitting on the blogs while on vacation, go out have fun, enjoy other people. Than once it over come back and light his ass on fire lol

      • Thanks 🙂 no, I haven’t seem him yet. I cancelled Sunday and we wouldn’t have been able to meet anyway as he ended up having to travel for work. I’m a little unsure on whether to wait til I see him or just do it on the phone. Face time maybe

      • With all the emotional spikes you actually took step back and decided to wait and calm down a bit, impressive lol

        Either way is fine I think, I am sure you decided what it a deal breaker and what is not. Personally i don’t believe in words much, people should be judged by their action and not by their words, words cost nothing and people will often say things to make you feel better.

      • I know, who would’ve thought it! It looks like we may meet this week, but judging by his last text he’s super stressed. And I’m now unsure if this week is the best time to raise it? God this is so confusing

  2. Well, it certainly is kind of weird… but there could be a good explanation, maybe they chose that wedding date because it represented something else, a grandmothers birthday or parents annievrsary. Go in with an open mind, but if it IS in fact just his “ex” or enstranged wife’s and his wedding date for no other reason, that should be a major red flag to you

    • Thanks 🙂 I’m trying to keep an open mind because I do like to look at other points of view and I like him. Not sure I want to believe everything has just been games until now, but yes. If there’s no real explanation then that won’t look good at all…

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